Yesterday afternoon, I met my son at the store to try on his tuxedo for the upcoming prom. We just needed to make sure it fit before we took it home. As he walked out of the dressing room, my eyes immediately zoomed in on the fact that the pants were too short. And that’s where my focus went, that’s what I talked about, and I quickly began looking for a staff member to help. I didn’t pause even for a minute to soak in the moment of seeing my precious guy in his prom tuxedo and complimenting him on how great he looked. Instead, I focused on the flaw. I could tell immediately by the look on his face that I had missed such a great opportunity to show love and admiration for my child.
Now I have good excuses: I was in a hurry (aren’t we always?), I’m action oriented and immediately identified the problem and was looking for a solution (it’s just who I am), and I was really just trying to be helpful. But we all know the truth – there is no excuse. It’s just a missed opportunity to show love.
I’m sometimes guilty of doing the same things with my kids when they come to me with problems. Rather than just listening, giving them a hug, and showing real love, sometimes I just dive right into giving advice.
Please know that I’m not proud of my actions and the only reason I’m sharing my mom fails (I’m sure there are a gazillion more) is that I have a feeling it isn’t just me (please say it isn’t just me) that doesn’t slow down enough in the chaos of our lives to give our kids what they need more than direction, instruction, and even sometimes discipline. What they need is our love. Our unconditional, undeserving, and lavishly given love. Just like the kind our Savior gives lavishly to us.
“Above all, love each other deeply.” ~ 1 Peter 4:8
My prayer is that I slow down long enough each day to show real love to the very ones that God has entrusted to my care. That I look for the positives before seeing the flaws. That I listen (really listen) more than I speak. That my words and actions are always reflective of Christ’s light and love. Thank you Lord for the opportunity to be a mom. Help me to get better at it each day.
Perhaps you might share in my prayer today or at the very least learn from my mistakes made along the way.
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